The Heart of Modesty: The Girl on the Magazine Cover: Fashion and the Power of Dressing Modestly

the Girl on the Magazine Cover

Some time ago, I was at the store picking up some ingredients for a cake I was making, and ended up strolling down the magazine aisle.

As I stopped to look to see if they had my dad’s favorite vintage cars magazine, I spotted something that disturbed me. Right underneath the men’s magazines were the women’s magazines with cover images of scantily clad women.  Women who had these ‘come hither’ looks on their faces while trying to keep hold of what little clothing they had so the most intimate parts of their bodies were [mostly] covered-though, to be quite honest, it wasn’t doing much good.

As I looked at these images, I was filled with anger. Anger that these images, and the models in them, are what girls and women look at thinking that these are the standards they have to look [and live] up to in order to be sees as beautiful.

Then, when I got home, I was scrolling on Facebook, and the link to an article that caught my eye. The name of the article: “10 wardrobe items that instantly make you more attractive”.

The whole entire article was about things that a woman absolutely must have in her wardrobe. There are two main points this article is pushing: how to keep it classy while still maintaining an element of “sensuality” and that to attain that you have to make sure that just enough of your body is showing–just not too much or else you’ll make yourself look ‘trashy’.

Merriam-Webster dictionary defines “Sensual” as the following: “relating to or consisting in the gratification of the senses”

So, essentially, this article is telling us that women have to dress to appeal to the senses of men. 

I would like to challenge that idea.

The Bible says:

“And I want women to be modest in their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw attention to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by the wearing of gold or pearls or expensive clothes.” 1 Timothy 2:9

On that note, let me tell you a bit of a story.

When I was in 7th grade, I became obsessed with the 70’s T.V. show adaptation o Little House on the Prairie. So much so, that I became completely in love with the way the women dressed. It also helped that it was modest as well as quite feminine-dresses all day every day? Yes please! However, I didn’t take into consideration the ridicule it would bring me from the other kids in school.

Then, when 8th grade rolled around, I decided to try something else: dress more modern. So, I started wearing mini-dresses that were…well…too mini. In fact, they were so mini, that I couldn’t bend down in them…But, I’ll spare you from those details.

This is when I stumbled upon two books that completely changed the way I look at clothing: The Bride Wore White and Secret Keeper: The Delicate Power of Modesty by speaker and author Dannah Gresh. (It also just so happens that Pure Freedom Ministries donated both of these books for a giveaway at the end of this series!)

So, why dress modestly? Well, we are called to honor God with our bodies. After all, we-our bodies-are the temple of God (1 Corinthians 6:19) If you were to be a representative of someone in a high authoritative position, you wouldn’t dress improperly. You’d dress in the appropriate attire. In the same way, we, as daughters of the King-as representatives of The King of Kings, are called to dress in a way that will bring honor and praise to him.

“And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are.” Matthew 6:28-29

One of the things I’ve found in my research is how so many basically say “in order to be modest you must dress like this”

However, lets go right back to the main point of this whole series: Modesty starts in your heart and works its way out.

As well-known speaker and author Jefferson Bethke once said, “A Woman must have her heart changed before her clothing ever will!”

At the same time, I also believe that if you are a Christian who is wholeheartedly seeking after Jesus, you need to ask him to convict you of the clothing you have that don’t bring honor to him.

Here are a few questions I go by when purchasing clothes:

First, I ask myself “Would I be wearing this because I like it, or because of the attention it would bring to me?” and “Am I bringing honor to God and the body he’s given me when I wear this?”

Then if it passes that test, these are a few guidelines I like to use when trying clothes on:

  1. If I bend over and feel like there’s nothing covering my back end, I wear a pair of black cycling shorts or tights underneath
  2. If the collar of my shirt is too low or so loose that if I bend down you can see down my shirt, I wear a camisole under it.
  3. I try to keep my dresses no shorter than knee length. If it is just at the top of my knee I wear tights. As for shorts, I never wear short-shorts or bootie shorts. I always find ones that go at least 3/4 of the way down my thighs (Hip-Hooray for Bermuda Shorts!).
  4. I try to keep my bra straps covered and only wear tank tops that have minimum 2 inch straps. Spaghetti straps are ALWAYS worm with a bolero of some kind.
  5. Nothing super, duper tight
  6. And finally, I don’t let any of my midriff show.

GTDM

Here’s the thing, summer doesn’t have to be filled with anxiety over clothes. Yes, it might be a little more difficult to find modest clothing, but there are so many fun modest clothing stores online that have wonderful modest and modern summer (and year round) clothing! And throughout this series, I’m featuring some amazing and affordable modest clothing companies that I highly encourage you to go check out!

Lastly, one of the reasons that is spoken about more often than not, when it comes to modesty, is that we need to dress modestly so that we don’t cause our brothers-in-Christ to stumble and lust after us. And while I totally, completely agree with this, we need to make sure that we aren’t losing focus of the real reason that we are choosing to dress modestly.

You see, when we put all the focus and reasoning for dressing modestly on guys- whether it’s so that you don’t attract the wrong kind of attention, cause your Christian brothers to stumble and lust after you, or so that you will attract the right kind of attention from a nice Christian guy who might see you as being a Godly woman worth pursuing- we are forgetting that the whole reason to dress modestly: To Bring Honor and Glory to God. 

In the end, it all comes down to this: What is your purpose? What are the secret thoughts in your heart, behind the clothes you are picking? To bring glory and attention to God, or to yourself? 

I want to challenge you, take a few moments today to ask God to start convicting you of the clothes that don’t bring glory to his name. Some of the clothes may be perfectly modest, however the reason behind the purchase may not be-I myself have gotten rid of several outfits that I bought because of that very thing.  And finally, ask him to change your heart, to work in you from the inside out, to make you the woman of God that he desires for you to become!

Finally, here are a few of my favorite modest summer outfits-including a new completely adorable swim dress from Dainty Jewell’s which is perfect for going to the beach and then running errands or to out to eat before or right after! (By-the-Way, Their clothing is SO adorable and SO worth the money spent!) The other outfits are clothing I bought at Walmart for relatively good prices. The blue jean shirt was my dad’s that he bought off e-bay that I expropriated from his closet. It’s one of my staple pieces as it’s big enough that you don’t get too hot when you’re wearing it in the summer!

 

 

 

 

Also, don’t forget about our book giveaway at the end of this series! We’ll be providing more information on how you can enter when we get closer to it! The books were donated from Dannah Gresh’s Ministry Pure Freedom Ministries (of which I also encourage you to go check out) and the notebook was custom designed (by yours truly!) specifically for this giveaway!

 

 

 

Until next time!

XoXo,

~Kristen~

Coming Changes

coming changes

Over the last couple of months, I haven’t been as busy on here as I could (and should) have been. In fact, I’ve had a few people notice as much and ask me what was going on.

Well, it’s actually been getting quite busy for me-summer always does! But, aside from that there have been some other changes and decisions that have taken the forefront of my mind.

Over the last couple of months or so, I’ve actually been feeling God shift some things with this ministry. I’ve been feeling things change for a while now, but I haven’t been sure exactly what those things were or how things were going to change with it. 

So, I’ve just been taking a little extra time to think and pray over these unidentified changes. Until recently…

You see, I’m not a sit-behind-a-computer-ministry kind of person (don’t get me wrong, I LOVE doing this, but it’s just not the true me). I’m a go-getter. I want to do. I want to be the physical hands and feet of Jesus. Getting right in the midst of things. Getting my hand dirty. (Growing up on a farm has that effect!) And lately, I’ve just been restless. knowing that I’m not living up to the full ministerial potential that God has put in me. Basically I miss physical interactive ministry.

Let me explain myself better; I’ve always been ‘mission minded’. I would go to church and hear big talk about the need and call to go out into the community and reach out to them, but when that didn’t happen, to say the least, I would quite get fired up. When I was in high school, I tried getting my youth group to do some sort of outreach in the high school. Something simple like giving candy bags out to the students during lunch break. Just getting the church youth doing something that would open up the doors to share Jesus with the community youth.

But, none of the adults that were involved with the church youth wanted to do that-or they just didn’t have the time to do it. 

Here’s the reason I’m telling you this. I’ve been praying over Unfading Beauty Ministries a lot lately, asking God where he wants it to go, and he has reminded me that the goal wasn’t to sit here and type ice words and nothing else. The goal of Unfading Beauty Ministries has always been-and will always be-to go and reach people for Christ. 

By this point, you’re probably wondering why I’m telling you this. Well, I write this because I want you to be aware of some of the changes that are going to be coming up.

First is a new website (hopefully we’ll have it launched by early to mid September). A new season of new changes calls for a new, fresh look!

Second is being more focused on doing more physical ministry. I’m praying that God will open up the doors for me to do more speaking engagements (if you’re interested in having me speak at your event, you can check out the Speaking Inquiries page for more info!) I’m also going to start planning the first ever Unfading Beauty Ministries Conference for Young Women! And pretty much just doing more outreach and follow the Great Commission:

Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.” Matthew 28:19

 

When you realize that you aren’t really fulfilling your full potential and calling, you find yourself worrying-at least that was the case for me!

I haven’t always been a fan of change. Change means that you have to step out into new and potentially uncomfortable situations, and after a high school career of uncomfortable situations, to say the least, I’m not a fan. However, as my friend’s mom told me a year ago: without change you can’t grow and without growth, God can’t use you. (Talk about a wake-up call!)

So, over the next several months, there are going to be some big changes; potentially even change in some of the content on this blog (don’t worry, it won’t be anything too outlandish! **wink**wink**)

So, at the end of this all, I would ask for your prayers that God will continue to reveal to me where he wants for this ministry to go!

XoXo,

~Kristen~

 

Summer Book Study!

Hello ladies!

It’s been a while, I know! I’ve been down a computer or the last several weeks and am hoping to buy a new one soon!

Anywho…

I have some SUPER DUPER exciting news!

You remember the eBook that I wrote and published earlier this year?

Well, I am going to be hosting a book study on it this summer and I want YOU–yes beautiful girl, you, the one reading this right now–to join us!

Here is the poster with the information! Please feel free to share it with your friends and invite them to join us!

Summer Book Study

Here’s the thing, I know that summer is all about fun and you don’t necessarily want to be stuck for hours and hours reading a book. Well, I have news for you! Each chapter in the ‘Unfading Beauty: Becoming Women of Biblical Beauty’ eBook is short and the perfect kind of summer study! 

Each chapter has some questions at the end, but rather than doing all of them, two or three key questions from each chapter will be selected to discuss so that we can gain the absolute most from each chapter/topic in the book! 

I am also SO excited for the beautiful community that we get to build through it through the group set up on Facebook!

So, download your FREE copy of the eBook, request to be pat of our Facebook Group and then tell your friends and lets all get ready and excited (I already am!) to grow in our relationships with Jesus together!

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me!

XoXo,

~Kristen~

Is God Really Enough? Where Christianity and Consumerism Collide

Is God Really Enough

It’s all around us. Television, radio, social media and the stores we shop in. People and products yelling at us to “buy this!” or “you need that!”

You go to your instagram account and up pops an image of someone telling you about the latest, greatest hair product or makeup brand or clothing store. 

We’re being told that buying it will fulfill our happiness. 

But then, when we buy it, while we’re happy for a fleeting moment, that feeling of emptiness always seems to come back. So, what do we do? We go out and buy something else that we’re told will fulfill us.

The millennial generation has become addicted to the high we get when we purchase something new. 

You go onto YouTube and see vlogs of people telling you about their latest “haul” of stuff they bought. And after a watching a few of those, you’re convinced that you absolutely have to have that stuff!

I know, I’ve been there myself. I used to watch one vlogger in particular, but eventually had to quit because I would start becoming dissatisfied with the my life and what I had. 

“Then he said, “Beware! Guard against every kind of greed. Life is not measured by how much you own.” ” Luke 12:15

When we start to think that the only way we’ll be happy is if we are buying something new, we are basically saying that God isn’t enough to satisfy and fulfill us. Yes, it might give you a temporary feeling of happiness, but here’s the thing happiness is based solely off of happenings. 

buying something new,

What we really want is joy-because joy isn’t that fleeting. Joy is that hope inside you that flickers when you are at a rough spot in your journey It’s that thing that tells you to “just look up” because the dawn is on its way. It’s that thing that tells you to keep holding on, because God’s got this-even though you might not understand what “this” is.

“Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal.”

Matthew 6:19-20

Ladies, we are called to live a higher standard. 

The sin isn’t in desiring something-whether it’s a new body lotion, makeup, or maybe even a relationship, the sin is when we obsess over it so much that we believe that it is the only thing that will fulfill our heart’s and joy.

“Don’t love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.” Hebrews 13:5

I want to challenge, next time you see something that you really want, pray about it. Surrender it to God. 

It could be as simple as saying “Lord, you know how much I want this (fill in the blank). I give this desire to you. Help me trust that you know what I need and don’t need. And help me remember, that you are always with me and that you have only the very best for me in mind. Amen.” 

So, Is God Really Enough? YES!

“And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19

XoXo,

~Kristen~